Episode 49
Reality is more participatory than we were taught.
Most of us were raised to think of choices as something that happens at big moments in life —
a major decision…
a turning point…
a moment where something clearly has to change.
But what if choice points are actually happening all the time?
Not just in the obvious places…
but in the quiet, almost invisible moments.
In a thought you follow…
or release.
In whether you pause…
or react.
In whether you assume you have no power…
or become curious about the one small thing you could choose.
And once you begin to notice them…
something interesting happens.
You start to realize that reality may be far more participatory than you were taught.
In this episode we’re going to explore how to recognize those moments… interrupt old patterns… and begin participating more consciously in the life that is unfolding through you.
If you want to join in that exploration…
pull up a comfy chair, invite in your Soul,
and be open to receive exactly what you need to live, be and thrive as the embodied soul you are.
Lately I’ve found myself contemplating, once again, this idea of choice.
And just how important it is at this time — when things are accelerating so quickly… as the world is changing so fast… as we are changing… as we lift in frequency… as we become more alchemical… as our presence — our being in our day-to-day lives — impacts the world around us.
Our choices become ever more important.
They’ve always been important, because they’ve always been creating the experience that we have. But now it feels like we see the ramifications — the outcomes of those decisions and choices — much more quickly.
There’s much less delay between cause and effect.
And so I’ve been pondering choice again.
Because I think most of us think about choice in a very specific way.
We think about the choices that we consciously make.
You contemplate something.
Maybe you debate it.
Maybe you even write your pros and cons list.
Or sometimes you make a choice based on a belief pattern or an inner aspect of yourself — so the choice is a bit more unconscious.
But still… you make a decision.
You take an action.
You move on.
That’s one level of choice.
But what’s been coming back into my awareness recently is something I’ve talked about over the years:
No choice… is still a choice.
When we make a conscious choice, we’re aware of it.
We’ve thought about it.
We understand it.
We understand the possible outcomes.
But when we choose not to act on something… that’s a choice too.
Sometimes people will say something like:
“I’m just not going to choose.”
“I’ll wait it out.”
Or sometimes people simply feel overwhelmed like:
“I don’t know what to do.”
“It’s too big.”
But the deeper truth remains.
You can choose not to make a choice.
And yet… by not choosing… by not taking action… by allowing the moment to pass…
that is still a choice.
You may even notice one right now.
And those choices still have ramifications.
Individually.
And collectively.
Then there is a third layer of choice.
And this one is often the most invisible.
It’s when we’re unconscious of the choice we’re making.
It just seems like:
“Oh, this is what I do.”
It’s autopilot.
You move through your day, responding to situations in ways that feel natural — so natural that you don’t even realize they’re choices.
And yet… they are.
So why do we make unconscious choices?
We’ve talked before about frames and lenses — the ways we see the world.
Many of those lenses were inherited.
Inherited through our families.
Through our culture.
Through our lineage.
And even through other lifetimes.
These lenses shaped how we learned to navigate the world.
They shaped how we learned to stay safe.
How we learned to belong.
How we learned to be who we were supposed to be.
And because those lenses were formed early, or formed through repetition, they begin to feel like truth.
But often they are simply strategies.
Strategies that once helped us survive.
So part of the work many people are doing right now — and part of the work the Guides often speak about — is clearing those old distortion lenses.
Becoming aware of them.
Because when we begin to see them… we realize that many of the choices we make every day are happening through those lenses.
So the invitation becomes awareness.
Where am I choosing consciously?
Where am I choosing not to choose?
And where am I simply running on autopilot?
Not as judgment.
Just as awareness.
Because when we understand why we choose what we choose, something interesting happens.
We begin to see the structures underneath our choices.
The mental ideologies.
The beliefs.
The inherited frameworks.
And when we see those underlying structures,
then new questions become possible.
Like, is this actually true for me now?
Is this teaching that I learned still aligned with who I am today?
And when we ask those questions, we open the door to something new.
The ability to choose again.
To choose consciously.
Not from fear.
Not from outdated lenses.
But from awareness.
And this awareness is not just personal.
It’s also collective.
Because something very interesting is happening in the world right now.
Many of the structures we have taken for granted are revealing themselves for what they actually are.
Agreements.
For example, this is a simple example, think about speed limits.
When we get a driver’s license, we agree to follow certain rules of the road.
But the reason those rules function is because we collectively agree to uphold them.
Speed limits themselves have changed over time.
They were lower when vehicles were less safe.
They increased as technology improved.
We’re not driving the Model T anymore.
So the agreements evolved as we gained new information.
And there’s a Maya Angelou quote that says:
Do the best you can until you know better.
Then when you know better… do better.
In the world right now, we’re seeing many agreements being tested.
Sometimes leaders break agreements we assumed everyone would follow.
Sometimes institutions behave in ways that reveal something important — that the original agreements no longer support those they were meant to serve… or that those agreements have become distorted over time.
And when that happens, something becomes visible that we often forget.
Rules and laws are simply agreements.
They only function if we collectively agree to uphold them.
If some people follow the agreements and others don’t, suddenly we realize something important.
These structures were never absolute truths.
They were collective agreements.
And that realization can feel destabilizing.
Because it also reveals something profound.
Reality is more participatory than we were taught.
The collective is built from micro-choices.
From the choices individuals make every day.
And this brings us back to where we began.
Choice.
Because when we understand that reality is shaped by the agreements we uphold, we begin to see that every moment holds choice points.
Sometimes those choice points are obvious.
But more often they’re subtle.
A pause.
A moment of tension.
A question arising inside you.
So let me offer a few simple ways you might begin to recognize these moments.
Often your body already knows.
Something tightens… or becomes opens.
You might notice a small contraction in your body.
A moment of hesitation.
Or a quiet inner voice that says:
“This doesn’t feel aligned.”
And sometimes the signal shows up as confusion.
You start spinning mentally:
“I don’t know what to do.”
“What difference would it make if I acted?”
“What could I possibly change?”
That moment is often a choice point.
And sometimes the mind keeps us in confusion because a part of us is trying to keep us safe.
When you begin to recognize these moments, something important becomes possible.
You can interrupt the pattern.
Sometimes the first conscious choice is simply to pause.
To take one breath before reacting.
And in that one small pause, a question can appear:
“What am I actually choosing right now?”
Just that moment of awareness can shift the entire trajectory of the situation.
Or you can ask a different question:
What if I did know?
Just that question…because the moment you ask it, something shifts.
The mind loosens its grip.
Space opens.
And sometimes the answer that comes is not huge.
It’s very small.
A conversation.
A boundary.
A decision about where you place your energy.
A choice about where you spend your money.
One small action.
And that is often how change begins.
Because every choice point quietly places us in front of three doors.
Because ultimately, we always have three choices.
You might imagine it almost like standing in front of three doors.
Every choice point places us there.
And each door leads somewhere different.
The first door is the known.
We continue choosing what we’ve always chosen
and we receive what we’ve always received.
The patterns continue.
The results continue.
Nothing really changes.
The second door is not choosing.
We tell ourselves we’ll wait.
Or that we don’t know.
Or that it’s too complicated.
And so we allow the momentum of the world
to carry us wherever it goes.
But even that…
is a choice.
The third door is the unknown.
This is where something new begins.
We choose a different response.
A different action.
A different way of being.
We choose a possibility…a new world, that doesn’t feel fully formed yet.
But one that we can feel.
Many people can sense it already.
We feel it in our bodies.
We dream it.
We glimpse it in moments of compassion, cooperation, and creativity.
It exists as potential.
And every conscious choice moves us closer to it.
Which brings this conversation back into the very practical parts of our lives.
Because this is where the conversation becomes real.
Not theoretical.
Not philosophical.
But lived.
And this isn’t about judging ourselves for the choices we’ve made.
It’s about becoming curious enough to notice them.
Because many of the realities we say we don’t want…
are often, being quietly reinforced by the small choices we continue making every single day.
And once we see that…something powerful becomes available.
We can begin choosing differently.
Because choice shows up everywhere.
So let me give you a few examples that come to mind…
Sometimes when we see something in the world that we don’t like, our first impulse is to complain about it - most often with others.
We may criticize it.
We may talk about how wrong it is.
But if those conversations are only about judgment or complaint, that is also a choice.
And that choice?
…It feeds the energy we say we don’t want.
Choice also shows up in where we spend our money.
If we disagree with a company’s values but continue to support it out of convenience, that is a choice.
Choice shows up internally as well.
Someone might say, out to the world, “I love everyone.”
But internally they criticize themselves constantly.
And if we are not loving ourselves, we are not actually embodying the love we speak about.
So these choice points exist everywhere.
Externally.
And internally.
As within, so without.
The world we see is shaped by the choices we make — and the ones we continue to make.
But the beautiful part of this moment in human history is that awareness is expanding.
People are questioning.
More people are noticing the lenses they inherited.
More people are beginning to realize that reality may be far more participatory than we are taught.
And the more honest we become about our choices — the ones made from fear, the ones made from habit, the ones made unconsciously — the faster things can shift.
Because awareness creates new choices.
And new choices create new possibilities.
So perhaps the invitation is simply this.
Begin noticing your choice points.
Notice when something in you contracts.
Notice when confusion arises.
Notice when you feel the quiet nudge that says:
“There is another way.”
And then pause.
Breathe.
Listen.
Your body knows.
You can use others as sounding boards.
But ultimately… you choose.
And those choices matter.
Individually. And collectively.
Because the future is not created all at once.
It’s created through millions of small choices.
Moment by moment. And many of those moments arrive far more quietly than we expect.
And maybe the most powerful thing to realize… is that choice points are rarely the big moments in life. They’re everywhere.
Sometimes they appear in the obvious places —
a big decision…
a turning point…
a moment when something clearly must change.
But more often…
they appear quietly.
In a thought you decide to follow…
or release.
In whether you pause…
or react.
In whether you continue an old pattern…
or interrupt it, even slightly.
In whether you assume you have no power…
or become curious about the one small way you might participate differently.
You may even be noticing a choice point in your own life as you listen.
So just for a moment…
you might ask yourself something simple.
Where is a choice point in my life right now…
that I may not have been recognizing as one?
Not the biggest decision.
Just the one that’s quietly present.
Because life rarely changes all at once.
It changes through the micro-choices we make…
again and again.
And as those choices shift…
so does the reality we experience.
Quietly.
Moment by moment.
The collective is built from those choices.
And so is your life.
And with that, we’ll leave it here for today.
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And I look forward to being with you again next week on Embodied Soul.
